


cold hands

by fictionalrobin



Series: a life without sensation [1]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Angst, Blood, Death, Good Parent Maryse Lightwood, Graphic Description of Corpses, Heavy Angst, Hurt Alec Lightwood, Hurt Magnus Bane, Kinda, M/M, Sad Alec Lightwood, i mean he's dead soooo, i watch too much bones, like seriously its gross, pretty hurt, she tries to comfort alec
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-30
Updated: 2017-12-30
Packaged: 2019-02-24 05:27:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 575
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13206945
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fictionalrobin/pseuds/fictionalrobin
Summary: what if Magnus didn't get away before the soulsword-blast?





	cold hands

Alec's heart hammered like the shots of a machine gun. All around him, bodies littered the floor, their stench clogging the air. Everytime he saw something even vaguely representative of his boyfriend, a sparkle of rings, a strand of black hair, he'd stop and stumble towards the body. 

He had to find Magnus.

Had to know he was okay. 

He'd been searching like this for hours now, long enough for the sun to rise, yet he couldn't bring himself to stop. 

As he rounded another corner, his sprint wobbled, the marble floors slippery from blood, and for a split second he lost balance. He collided with the wall and slid down to the floor, blood smearing his clothes. 

 _A_ _nd_ _that's_ _when_ _he_ _saw_ _it._

At first glance he was barely recognisable, his skin was blistered and swollen, and on one side of his face, it was completely burned off. Half of his hair was gone too, hanging in bloody chunks off his scorched scalp. But the worst were his eyes.

The right one was glowing faintly with gold, the pupil slanted and unglamured. 

But the other one,

The other one bulged out of his skull like a golf ball. There was no eyelid left to cover it. The sclera was red instead of white, and where a warm golden iris should've been, there was only a white emptiness. 

But it was him

 _I_ _t_ _was_ _M_ _agnus_ _lying_ _there_

Alec's insides filled with icy water, and his brain went numb. If he hadn't already been on the ground, his knees would've given in by now. 

Everything was quiet, like he'd been locked in a bubble of soundproof glass, muffled away from the rest of the world. It was like that feeling you get on the highest peek of a rollercoaster, right when it drops. It was like that, but stretched out into forever, just falling, falling, falling without anything to catch you at the bottom. 

Someone was screaming. Loud and with their whole body. The kind of scream that rips from the deepest part of your soul and tears your lounges in half, and it took a while for him to realise it was him.

_Magnus._

Someone had made their way over to him, clutching him as he wailed, but he couldn't feel them, he couldn't feel a thing. His vision had tunneled and twisted. He wrapped his arms tightly around himself, fingernails digging into his sides. 

He could hear the other person talking, but their words just mashed together into meaningless mush. He captured a few words, though. Words with no meaning. Words like "okay" and "sorry" and he sobbed, rocking back and forwards as he dug his fingers harder into his sides, hard enough to draw blood. 

"...no," he sounded more like a bratty child, who didn't want to share his favourite toy. He sniffled, gasping for air, as tears and snot clogged his windpipes. More people had arrived now, some were attempting to comfort him, while others just stood there. Someone was stroking his hair. Humming under their breath, a familiar tune his mother used to sing, when he or one of his siblings had a nightmare. 

But it was all so far away. All he could see was Magnus. Magnus smiling at him the first time they met. Magnus laughing. Magnus kissing him. Magnus lying on the floor of the institute, face burned to the bone. 

 _H_ _e_ _was_ _gone_ _._

**Author's Note:**

> he ded
> 
>  
> 
> (and theres a sequel now since yall thirsty)


End file.
